Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Smile

(from an old Maybank advert, I think)

A smile is quite a funny thing
It lightens up your face
And when it's gone you'll never find
Its secret hiding place
Far more wonderful it is
To see what smile can do
You smile at me
I smile at you
And so one smile makes two

Smile
Smile
It isn't hard to do
Smile for a while
And let one smile catch two...

Smile
Smile
The magic shining through
Smile from your heart
And the world smiles with you...

Bahasa version:

Senyum Seindah Suria,
Yang membawa cahya,
Senyumlah dari hati,
Duniamu berseri,

Senyum umpama impian,
Dalam kehidupan,
Kau tersenyum ku tersenyum
Kemesraan menguntum...

Senyum..kepada semua,
Senyumanmu amatlah berharga
Senyum..umpama titian
Dengan senyuman terjalinlah ikatan...

Monday, November 24, 2008

Blowjob & bungee-jumping

Wow it's been 2 months ++ since my last post. To Jerine & Michael, thanx for appreciating my parody of Malaysian leaders using the "Why did the chicken cross the road?" joke. I've got another one...but it's dirty, haha. Here it goes...

Q: What is the similarity between getting blowjob from a granny and bungee-jumping?
A: It feels great in both cases...but for goodness' sake, NEVER EVER look down!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Why did the chicken cross the road? (Malaysian version)

DISCLAIMER: This post is purely meant for entertainment purposes only.

Lingam
It looks like a chicken, it sounds like a chicken but I'm not saying it's a chicken
Correct, correct, correct!

Son-in-Law
to be the first chicken Prime Minister before age 40

Syed Hamid
we are tabling a new Bill to stop the chicken from crossing the road....No, this is not politically motivated

Arif Shah
to study PhD in Edision University lah...

Ahmad Ismail
because its ancestors are immigrants and squatters

Rosmah
I was not there when the chicken crossed the road

Najib
I have never met the chicken....huh, what photo?...oh all right, it crossed the road to my house to request for scholarship

PI Bala (before disappearing)
My previous SD was made under duress....I hereby declare that did not see or hear the chicken cross the road

Muhyiddin
I invited it back into UMNO

DSAI
to cross over to Pakatan come September 16

Saiful
I swear the chicken just put its ***** into my *** without my consent!!!

Che Det
chicken mudah lupa. Saya juga mudah lupa

Patrick Teoh
niamah!!!

Pak Lah
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Sunday, July 27, 2008

The Dark Knight

Holy sh*t...I just checked out IMDB's Top 250 minutes ago and guess what? The Dark Knight is ranked #1!!!!! The last time I saw the rankings 6 months ago, the Godfather was still tops, followed very closely by the Shawshank Redemption at #2. But now, the Dark Knight is by far highly rated compared to these 2 great films. Here's the latest Top 3 by average score and # of voters (me being one of them):

1) The Dark Knight (2008) - 9.3 (135,443 votes)
2) The Shawshank Redemption (1994) - 9.1 (345,543 votes)
3) The Godfather (1972) - 9.1 (295,769 votes)

I spent RM9 to watch the Dark Knight earlier this afternoon (i.e. Sunday matinee) at IOI Mall Puchong. I was glued to my seat from start to finish. Whenever I thought I could catch a breather after an adrenaline-filled subplot, I was being brought into another roller-coaster ride. The overall storyline was good enough to make up for any minor loopholes.

On the acting, Christian Bale and Gary Oldman were up to my expectations. Quite the same as their performance in Batman Begins. On the other hand, Maggie Gyllenhaal gave much more depth to the character of Rachel Dawes. I thought that Aaron Eckhart played Harvey Dent well. The transformation from a passionate champion of justice to a vengeful killer was quite credible. Like everyone else, I will give the most credit to the late Heath Ledger, whose acting as the Joker was out-of-the-world.

My ratings: 9.5/10

Kudos to my favourite director Christopher Nolan, whom I became a fan in 2004 after watching his year 2000 masterpiece Memento (yes, that's where I got the name of this blog). I have been enjoying his subsequent films - Insomnia, The Prestige, Batman Begins and now The Dark Knight. While The Dark Knight is more appealing to the general audience and hence higher-ranked in IMDB, Memento remains as the better film IMHO.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

News That Will Rock The Nation

Haris Ibrahim says DSAI will hold a press conference (PC) today at 11am to reveal proof of Najib's links to Altantuya Sharibuu
http://harismibrahim.wordpress.com/2008/07/03/news-that-will-rock-the-nation

I can't wait...

Enough of bickering!!!

Malaysiakini reported today (Jul 2, 2008 5.17pm)
Syed Hamid: Anwar a US 'snitch'

The finger pointing is getting out of hand. Why don't anybody just throw out some hard evidence so that the rakyat knows who's lying and who's not? The KLCI just plunged to 1,153 points, the lowest in the last 12 months (if I'm not mistaken).

As much as I believe that Dato' Seri Anwar Ibrahim is being framed for sodomy this time round, I won't rule out the possibility (however remote) that DSAI himself orchestrated the whole drama. As much as I hope that there is a change of governance in Malaysia, I wouldn't want to see the issue being dragged too long. Whether or not a political leader sodomised a young man can't be more important than the issues of price inflation, non-independent judiciary & police force, economic hardships, etc. right?

And one lesson to learn from "V for Vendetta" is...we should not elevate any politician to the status of supreme leader. I'm just worried that in the thirst for change & good leadership, we may risk putting too much importance & ultimately, too much political influence into the hands of Dato' Seri Anwar Ibrahim.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

It's 1998 all over again?

HELP!!! SOS!!! They are using the same dirty tactic against Dato Seri Anwar Ibrahim again.

Malaysiakini reports that the police will be arresting DSAI for sodomy...based on a police report lodged by the alleged victim - DSAI's aide.
Police only 'interviewed' those named in RPK's statutory declaration.
A police officer only gets disciplinary action for raping a 17-year old girl IN THE POLICE STATION...

DSAI, please release immediately the proof that IGP Musa Hassan and AG Abdul Gani Patail fabricated the evidence against you in 1998.

RPK, please show us immediately the proof that the military report mentioned in your SD indeed exists.

Quote from V for Vendetta: "The people afraid of the government? The government should be afraid of the people".

Indeed, Umno is very very afraid of the prevalence of truth, the power of the rakyat and of Dato' Seri Anwar Ibrahim....

Friday, June 27, 2008

Look Who's Talking (posted May 10, 2008)

BN government lied to the rakyat in all possible ways over a far longer period.

Taken from the New Straits Times (10 May 2008):

KUALA LUMPUR: Selangor Barisan Nasional chief Tan Sri Muhammad Muhammad Taib yesterday, with a tinge of sarcasm, congratulated the Pakatan Rakyat-led state government for a job well done.
"I heartily congratulate the state government of Selangor, because after less than two months in power, it has succeeded in openly lying to the people who voted for it," he said in his blog yesterday.Muhammad joined Deputy Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak in chastising the Selangor government for not living up to PR's pre-election promises of lower taxes and free education.The state government recently said it would be unable to deliver its promise of a 20 per cent and 10 per cent reduction in assessment taxes and commercial property taxes respectively this year.Muhammad said it was irresponsible to make a promise and then retract it.
"Some might even construe it as a breach of trust, an abuse of goodwill, because a lot of people might have voted for the opposition based on that promise," he said, adding that Barisan Nasional always made promises based on its ability to deliver them.

Look who's talking?

The Notorious KL Flash Flood (posted Apr 16, 2008)

Last year I saw it in the papers. Car park near KLCC flooded till at least waist level.

Today I became a victim. There was a heavy downpour in KL around 3.30pm. By 4.15pm water was already rising. Prudential sent an email to all staff. I dashed to my car, but it was to late. The alarm was ringing. Water had found its way into my car & immersed the pedals. I tried to ignite. Dead.

I had to think quick. The alarm still sounded quite loud. My car needed power for reignition later. So I opened the bonet & unplugged the battery terminals. No more alarm. Then I released the handbrake & shouted for help from the car par attendants. After pushing another car, 2 fellas came & helped push mine to dry land.

It was like an aquarium inside. I took an empty 1.5l mineral water bottle from my boot (thank goodness it's still dry), cut off the top and started scooping mudwater out. Just then a girl got her Kelisa pushed to safety as well. Her alarm was still ringing. I took my spanner & unscrewed the nut that held the battery terminal tight. No more alarm. I gave her my water scoop too.

After waiting half an hour, I tried connecting the terminals & reignite. Failed to start. A good Samaritan came by & pulled out the alarm cable from a socket located beneath the radio. My car then roared to live again, finally!!!

I spent the rest of the time soakin up water with a towel & revving up my car. Dinner appointment got cancelled cuz Eng Yau's & Lisa's car also suffered the same fate.

The SMART tunnel was built to solve these problems. Now I gotta endure the stench for weeks. But thank goodness I came down in time. Otherwise...engine overhaul.

Welcome to KL, Ipohmali.

Malaysia Today (posted Dec 28, 2007)

Wah it's been more than a month since my last post. Haven't written anything since Ching Wei and Chow Pin got married early November. And many things have happened during the last 6 weeks - in my life, in Malaysia and most recently in Pakistan (Benazir Bhutto's assassination).

I shall summarise the part on Malaysia, as many of you would know as much as or perhaps more than me:

1) Two major rallies - Bersih for electoral reforms (coincided with Ching Wei's wedding lunch) and Hindraf to express the discontent of ethnic Indians - took place in the land where the people were SUPPOSED to live in racial and religious harmony. But are we really? The Election Commission was SUPPOSED to be politically neutral. Are they really? The Anti Corruption Agency was also SUPPOSED to weed corruption in the government. But did they really hunt down the biggest culprits?


2) The PM declaring that he does not like to be challenged, he has BIG EARS and he would not hesitate to use the Internal Security Act (ISA) as the LAST RESORT (Well he did)


3) UMNO MPs making statements to score political points but defeated their purposes by exposing the PM, his government and Politburo for what they REALLY ARE and also contradicting the SUPPOSED moderateness of Islam Hadhari.


4) The Politburo head ALLEGED that Hindraf was linked to terrorists (without proof) and got them detained under ISA. 31 PEOPLE were charged with TRYING to murder ONE Politburo officer. Several people from the Bersih rally and Bar Council were arrested as well. All in the name of (Barisan) NASIONAL SECURITY.


5) The deputy Internal Security Minister threatened the Catholic weekly The Herald with permit withdrawal for using the ARABIAN term for God (claimed to be reserved for the usage of Muslims only) in its Bahasa Malaysia section.


6) My friend Kenny and I shared the 1-year subscription fee of RM150 for Malaysiakini.com. Kenny thinks it's his best investment in 2007. I just think that I'm reading REAL news, finally...

Mr and Mrs Tan (posted Nov 17, 2007)


The photo of the handsome Tan Chow Pin and gorgeous Yong Ching Wei (henceforth will be known as Mr and Mrs Tan):

Brothers-in-Bride (posted Nov 16, 2007)

It was a very wet morning last Saturday. All major roads around KL were congested like mad (no thanks to the police setting up road blocks to prevent people from going for the BERSIH rally). If it wasn't for Ching Wei and Chow Pin's wedding lunch, I would have joined Kenny in Dataran Merdeka. Well I managed to reach Royale Bintang Damansara by 1pm using the backdoor way (Puchong-Sunway-Subang Jaya-Glenmarie-NKVE-Kota Damansara) instead of LDP.

The UAL people had a table all for ourselves - Alex, Haw Yun, Hong Sen and Liza, Grace, Hooi Lee, Judy and her beau Adrian, Chong and me. Hong Sen & Liza came during the 2nd course (shark's fin soup). Chong made a very fashionably late entrance. And he thought Ching Wei didn't notice, haha.

After the lunch Alex, Chong, Haw Yun and me sat @ Starbucks for "panoramic viewing". I introduced Toffee Nut Frappucino to the lads. Midway thru, Ching Wei and Chow Pin came for photo shoot at our table. I went for Mass @ SFX after that.

Carolling practice that night was particularly fun. A group of us got together to sing some pop songs while Magdalene played the piano. I also found out that Rachel is Mei Lih's old schoolmate. I have another booze kaki, haha! We closed the practise with action song Mary Did You Know waaaay past midnight.

The next morning I had to wake up early cuz I'm helping out as Chow Pin's "brother-in-bride". We assembled at Jusco Balakong at 8.30am. This time Hong Sen was slightly late again but Haw Yun made the fashionably late entrance instead. Ching Wei's "sisters" made us do pushups and drink liquids with 4 different tastes. The rest were all up to Chow Pin himself. He had to sing love songs, recall his wedding vows and answer endless tough questions about his bride and her family. After giving out quite a number of angpows (as penalty for each wrong answer), he finally managed to get to his bride!!!

As Semenyih is not very far from Balakong, I went to my sister's halls after the wedding to pass her some items from Ipoh. Then I rushed back to SFX for "Our Father's Plan". My final activity for the weekend was making the announcement for World Youth Day during the 5.30pm Mass.
2 days of weekend come and gone, just like that...